Everyone had those dreams they wish would have come true, and those dreams that seem so funny now.
Here are some of mine:
First, all I ever wanted to be was a singer. Perhaps like Taylor Swift. I wanted to be the best singer out there. To come back to family functions and class reunions and be famous. Honestly, I wasn't even that good. That tid bit did not stop me from begging my parents to relocate to Nashville year after year, give me voice lessons, and make ridiculous demos. When I was younger being a singer was the only thing to be. Singing was all I had.
Though the thing with dreams is that as you get older so do they. Eventually being a singer was a little outlandish, and well, I was past my prime. Now I want to be a journalist. I want to spread news to the public and I want to be trusted to give the truth. I'm starting to find that even this dream is harder to obtain than I thought.
Second is a dream I still wouldn't change. When I was in high school I had a bit of a tiff with my cheer coach and a lot of the girls on the team. It was one big cat fight. I hated it, and myself for that matter. You don't really understand the bottom of the barrel until you are there. And boy was I. This is a story too long for one blog. But I will get to it eventually. Though in this time, as I sat in the hall way hyperventilating, one of the school councilors told me "I see so many kids that would have such better lives if they didn't go through these halls." These words have always stuck with me and is something I hope to one day do something about. For a while it was a goal to me a motivational speaker, go to schools and tell those kids that high school isn't it. One day things will be better.
It is something to think on, but that is a dream I know will never change.
The most outlandish of my dreams... and the longest standing dream. My two story closet. This one right here, no one is going to change my mind on. It will be marvolous. Every inch covered in color coordinated clothes. Shoes will line the walls. A grand staircase right up the middle highlighting my favorite things. See, to me this closet is it. It is the "Congratulations Shelby, you have made it," symbol. clothes have always been the thing I could take pride in. They don't hurt you, they only leave when you get rid of them. I know it sounds crazy, but clothing is a constant, and it feels so good to slip on that new unworn shirt or dress. this is where it's at, and one day it will be all mine.
Lastly, I wanted someone great to share my life with. YES! I know, it is crazy to think I (never going to get married or settle down) wanted someone. But at one point I did. Even knew who the guy was. He is wonderful, the best. We talk for hours, love books and some said we would have nerdy kids with glasses. Another shocker, with him I could kind of think of kids... though they are still creepy.
But that is the thing with dreams, as you get older so do they. I know now he was not meant to be my person. I will always share my life with him, but not on the level I once thought. Since then I have gone through phases. I spent a long time knowing I was not meant for someone else. Not in a pity way, but I really didn't want it. Recently I have been trying to get away from that. Other people are scary though. you don't know what they are going to do, and frankly it's really hard.
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